Thank you, Sincerely Artemis
by greenpineapple
Summary: A story to celebrate Artemis' birthday.


**I wrote this in honor of Artemis' birthday which was yesterday. It is short and sweet. Read on people!**

Yesterday

Artemis closed the front door and turned to go upstairs. "Where are you going birthday boy?" his mother called up to him before he shut his bedroom door.

"I am just writing that you notes before we go out for dinner moth-mum, I'll be right back down," he answered. And with that the one year older juvenile genius closed the door, sat down at his desk and began to write…

Today

The next day these arrived to the corresponding people…

Dear Butler,

Thank you for making sure that I made it to my birthday this year, I am about 97% sure that I wouldn't be here without you. Now, in regards to your presents, thank you. The card was extremely humorous. Also I appreciate the thought of making me physically stronger as well as mentally. However the ten pound weights are rather useless as I can't lift them as of right now. I'm sure you'll try to get me to use them anyway though. Good luck.

Sincerely, Artemis

Dear Mother (Mum),

Thank you so much for all the attention on my birthday. I really do enjoy your company, especially on a day as memorable as my birthday. Generally in thank you notes people thank others for their thoughtful gifts so thank you for the interesting clothes. They are sure to come in handy because my other t-shirt (the one that read,"Randomosity") was in a terrible accident so I had no "normal" clothes anymore. Thank you again Mother.

Sincerely, your son Artemis

Dear Father,

How should I express my gratitude to you? I know Mother is trying her best to help me to become more like an average teenager but does she really think the way to do that is through baggy jeans that sag and graphic t-shirt that advertise product and companies that any sane person would not willingly relate themselves with? Needless to say the new Armani suits you gave me for a present is a lifeline to me. Thank you again.

Sincerely, your son Artemis

Dear Myles,

Thank you for the card. I am incredibly proud that you were able to make that yourself, it was wonderful to hear your voice recording of "Happy Birthday". Undoubtedly, it was much nicer than any other card you could have bought. I wouldn't expect anything different from a Fowl.

Love your older brother Artemis

Dear Beckett,

Thank you for the creative presents. The jar of worms is especially original. Your card is going above my desk, it was incredibly sweet. Keep up with your French lessons.

Love your big brother Artemis

Dear Holly,

Thank you for risking your neck asking for yesterday off, I'm sure Trouble made Julius proud when you asked. It was nice to see you without the threat of world domination or the like hanging over our heads. I have looked at the books you gave me about fairy history. They are very intriguing although I doubt that you have found time to read them as they are rather large and you are very busy. Thank you again.

Sincerely, your friend Artemis

Dear Juliet,

I'm glad you were able to make my birthday party yesterday as I know your wrestling schedule is jam-packed with opponents that have yet to meet your jade ring. I will try to be there when they become acquainted as frequently as my many schemes will allow.

Sincerely, Artemis

P.S. don't worry, some of my upcoming plans are almost completely legal, the straight and narrow is more curved anyways.

Dear Foaly,

How clever of you! I greatly enjoyed the intellectual challenge that your present presented. I finished the puzzle within five minutes however those five minutes were decently stimulating. You better start on the one that I am giving you for your birthday now though.

Sincerely, Artemis

Dear Mulch,

I am glad that you were able to make it up to the surface yesterday; it was _good_ that it was overcast for once. I am also glad that at least one of my friends understands that me stopping all devious plotting is insane. Your beard hairs, however unsanitary, are sure to come in handy.

Sincerely, Artemis

Dear N°1,

Once in a thousand years someone gets a present that is truly magical. Yesterday, that happened to me, literally. I find the magic bird you conjured up for me intriguing to say the least. If I may guess how you made him I would say that you took some of your magic sparks and commanded them to form that shape which is amazing. Anyway, thank you for my beautiful pet.

Sincerely, your friend Artemis

**Artemis is probably a bit out of character but anyway; please tell me what you think. Thank YOU.**

**-greenpineapple**


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